Disclaimer: the following blog post contains subject matter which is not suitable for anyone under the age of 18 (That means you Mahtab!)(which isn't to say that you shouldn't read on if you're so inclined)
I'm really bored, and need a Mahtab repellant, so I've decided that instead of writing something dirty I would just list a bunch of horribly cruel scenarios of torture.
1.The fish-hook torture. This one involves constant anttention unless you want them to die. First of all, the subject must be subdued with drugs untill they are in the desired position. They are then tied into place (preferably standing) and then have fish-hooks pierced through their skin and pulled away from them. They are left in this position untill they bleed dry. The blood falling can also be retreived and re-inserted (using extrodinary means) into the circulatory system for a prolonged experience.
2-1.The Rat torture. THis one involves a pot of rats being attached to a victims body. Hot charcoal is then placed in the pot, causing the rats to try to escape by gnawing through the person.
2-2.Another variation on the rat torture. This time the has only one or two rats in it and is secured to the victim with a brand, or by burning it onto the victim by other means, usually in an area of high sensitivity. The victim is restrained so that they cannot touch the area with the pot attached. The scurrying of the rats on the person's skin would cause them to go insane. It is similair to the water drip torture.
3.Water cure. The victim is restrained and then has a funnel forced down their throat. Their nose is pinched or otherwise so that they cannot use it to breath. Water or another alternative is then poured down the funnel in large amounts untill the victim's stomach is almost bursting. The liquid is then forced out of their stomach and the process is begun anew. Can be used in collaboration with enemas.
4.Electro-fun. In this one, the person is tied down. An open electric circut is then created using a control box for adjustable intensity. One end of the circuit can be attached to the body (more effectively in a sensitive area), while the other is held in the torturers hand. This end can now be pressed onto the subjects's body, thereby causing an electric current to run through their body. Totally non-lethal.
5.Bamboo torture. Ooooooooooh yay, botany! In this one, the victim is suspended just above a flowerbed with fast growing bamboo in it, positioned right under the person's body. If conditions are ideal, in a day the bamboo will have pierced their skin, and within three days, they will have a tree growing through them! (seriously, it works!)
6.The quicky. This is more meant to relish thheir reletively quick death, not watch them suffer for all eternity. First, douse them in oil or another similairly flamable substance. Next, shoot them in both knees (using something low power so it doesn't make it all the way through, that way they have a bullet stuck in the joint) Next light a match and throw it on them. Last step; observe.
For the record, I'm not some sick freak who has actually done these. However, I do have the mind to think them up, and am a sadist, so trust me, I have wanted to. Mwa ha ha ha ha!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
IB Corruption
You must have heard of the International Baccalaureate. It's a sooper advanced placement program in Highschool. You have to be able to do huge amounts of homework and have great time management skills. That is if you even make it past the rigorous entry exam. "Why even apply?" you may ask. Because, if you survive, you have an express ticket into just about any university you could want.
The reason that I am writing this post is that i have recently come into contact with some very relevant information partaining to a certain International program.
It seems that Bayveiw Hills has an intermediate IB pilot program going on. This would normally be fine, but it seems that the high school that is hosting IB is trying to establish a steady stream of acceptants from Bayveiw Hills.
This may seem fine from an external standpoint, but on the inside it is quite obviously corrupt. They will only accept 100 applicants, which is roughly 2/13 of the total amount. The problem here is, with the steady stream of acceptees from Bayveiw, they gain priority. So in other words, numerous applicants who, on an even playing feild, would get in, are being pushed out by inferior applicants from Bayveiw Hill.Also, the Bayveiw applicants from this pilot program are most likely prepped for the test, which would imply that they have an unfair advantage.
All in all, this is just another fine example of how incredibly Fucked up our world is.
PS. I got in, so please don't think this is my bitter and futile way of vindicating myself against an unfair system that has completely Fucked me over. It is merely observations from an onlooker who refuses to quiet down.
The reason that I am writing this post is that i have recently come into contact with some very relevant information partaining to a certain International program.
It seems that Bayveiw Hills has an intermediate IB pilot program going on. This would normally be fine, but it seems that the high school that is hosting IB is trying to establish a steady stream of acceptants from Bayveiw Hills.
This may seem fine from an external standpoint, but on the inside it is quite obviously corrupt. They will only accept 100 applicants, which is roughly 2/13 of the total amount. The problem here is, with the steady stream of acceptees from Bayveiw, they gain priority. So in other words, numerous applicants who, on an even playing feild, would get in, are being pushed out by inferior applicants from Bayveiw Hill.Also, the Bayveiw applicants from this pilot program are most likely prepped for the test, which would imply that they have an unfair advantage.
All in all, this is just another fine example of how incredibly Fucked up our world is.
PS. I got in, so please don't think this is my bitter and futile way of vindicating myself against an unfair system that has completely Fucked me over. It is merely observations from an onlooker who refuses to quiet down.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
How sad is it that I have an A average and am still the antisocial psycho that is me?
Now you may think that this is just going to be some insane rant about how sorry for myself i am, but that'd be wrong. That having been said, let's get started.
I've noticed recently, that many people in this world change themselves to conform to an image, or ideal. I'm no exception to this. I've noticed that since I came to this school in Gr.4, people have become nicer to me every year, and i have subsequently been dumbing myself down. It seems that if you use a large vocabulary etc. that people don't seem to like you as much.
That is not to say that you have to let your grades fall as well to become popular. My friend has been popular forever, and up untill last year retained an A average. So the key is not to destroy your academic life, but to simply sound less serious and more casual in conversation.
That said, there is another stereotype I would like to address. It seems that I you are cool, or a punk, etc. that stereotype is to be stupid. Also, the stereotype for an intelligent person is preppy and condescending. Take for example some famous rock stars.
What do Marilyn Manson (aka Brian Hugh Warner), Alice Cooper and Ozzy Osbourne all have in common (other than being famous rockstars)? They are all very intelligent, to the point that Cooper and Manson both have University Degrees. This highly contradicts both the stereotype of a punk (if they can be labeled as that) and the stereotype of an intelligent person.
All of these artists have their various addictions, whether it's drugs (Ozzy and Cooper)or alchohol (Manson). This shows that rich people tend to get more messed up than poor people. That seems to contradict the fact that when a parent sends their kid to a private school, part of their motive is always to keep their kid clean. Little do they know that it is actually the rich, preppy kids that get high or drunk more than anyone.
This just goes to show you that a book should never be judged by it's cover. After all, if life has gone to show us anything, it's that looks can be very deceptive. On a side note, You don't need to be "gangsta" top be cool, and you don't need to be preppy and condescending to be smart. when put into moderation, they can both be utelised. After all, those anti-social beliefs and questions toward "The System" had to have stemmed from someone intelligent, as it takes someone that is at least a little bit perceptive to notice these flaws in the first place.
Wow. That went from "you don't have to be a dork to be smart" to a complex ethical discussion on how you should look at someone. Sad.
Signing off for the night, Me.
I've noticed recently, that many people in this world change themselves to conform to an image, or ideal. I'm no exception to this. I've noticed that since I came to this school in Gr.4, people have become nicer to me every year, and i have subsequently been dumbing myself down. It seems that if you use a large vocabulary etc. that people don't seem to like you as much.
That is not to say that you have to let your grades fall as well to become popular. My friend has been popular forever, and up untill last year retained an A average. So the key is not to destroy your academic life, but to simply sound less serious and more casual in conversation.
That said, there is another stereotype I would like to address. It seems that I you are cool, or a punk, etc. that stereotype is to be stupid. Also, the stereotype for an intelligent person is preppy and condescending. Take for example some famous rock stars.
What do Marilyn Manson (aka Brian Hugh Warner), Alice Cooper and Ozzy Osbourne all have in common (other than being famous rockstars)? They are all very intelligent, to the point that Cooper and Manson both have University Degrees. This highly contradicts both the stereotype of a punk (if they can be labeled as that) and the stereotype of an intelligent person.
All of these artists have their various addictions, whether it's drugs (Ozzy and Cooper)or alchohol (Manson). This shows that rich people tend to get more messed up than poor people. That seems to contradict the fact that when a parent sends their kid to a private school, part of their motive is always to keep their kid clean. Little do they know that it is actually the rich, preppy kids that get high or drunk more than anyone.
This just goes to show you that a book should never be judged by it's cover. After all, if life has gone to show us anything, it's that looks can be very deceptive. On a side note, You don't need to be "gangsta" top be cool, and you don't need to be preppy and condescending to be smart. when put into moderation, they can both be utelised. After all, those anti-social beliefs and questions toward "The System" had to have stemmed from someone intelligent, as it takes someone that is at least a little bit perceptive to notice these flaws in the first place.
Wow. That went from "you don't have to be a dork to be smart" to a complex ethical discussion on how you should look at someone. Sad.
Signing off for the night, Me.
El Scorcho
wish I could get my head out of the sand
'Cause I think we'd make a good team
And you would keep my fingernails clean
But that's just a stupid dream that I won't realize
'Cause I can't even look in your eyes
Without shakin', and I ain't fakin'
I'll bring home the turkey if you bring home the bacon.
I'm a lot like you so please
Hello, I'm here, I'm waiting
I think I'd be good for you
And you'd be good for me
I'm a lot like you.
I'm a lot, and I'm waitin.
I think I'd be good for you
And you'd be good for me.
'Cause I think we'd make a good team
And you would keep my fingernails clean
But that's just a stupid dream that I won't realize
'Cause I can't even look in your eyes
Without shakin', and I ain't fakin'
I'll bring home the turkey if you bring home the bacon.
I'm a lot like you so please
Hello, I'm here, I'm waiting
I think I'd be good for you
And you'd be good for me
I'm a lot like you.
I'm a lot, and I'm waitin.
I think I'd be good for you
And you'd be good for me.
Friends (and enemies too)
As promised, this is the list of people I've come to like (and dislike)
Ali. Ali is my best friend. He's kinda weird, but thats kinda what I like about him. He's also really dirty minded (in a think up the most sexual scene contest, he could beat most pornstars)He usually plays football, but sometimes (and I mean rarely, walks around with us.
Mayuran, Michael, Boudy, Mathew, Jace, Zack and Chris. These guys are all buddies that I've known for a while. We aren't like best friends, and aren't even that close as friends. But we'll still get together and have a good time. Mathew is huge (6ft and we're not even in high school yet, Mayuran is lanky and likes to run. Boudy is a lot like Mayuran, but he's a tech genius too. Jace and Zack are both some of the "popular people". Chris is just plain freaking annoying. He's always trying to tell you about some throw he made the day before, or some other sportsa related thing that he's done and thinks for some unknown reason you would like to hear about (we're not really friends)
Bradley, Ganan, Edvin, Dima and Linar. Brad, Ganan, Edvin and Dima all hang out with Bailey. We all used to be friends (except for Bailey) but since he came it all kinda came unglued. Edvin and I were already not very friendly, as he seems to think life is a free ride, one of my major pet peeves. Ganan, Brad, Dima and I were really close, but when Bailey came they started to hang out with him, and by this year, once we we're in different classes, we're barely even friends anymore, much to my dismay. Linar is Dima's friend. I don't really like him.
Bailey, if you didn't get this from my last post, isn't exactly my best friend. He used to run into me in the hall whenever he walked by. He's always been a major prick. Keep in mind that he's ap to my chest in height, and not exactly burly. I'm 5'5, o that makes him about 4'5. He LOVES to be condescending, and is impossible to play sports with due to the fact that if you score a point, or do anything succesfully, he'll make some outrageous call that obviously didn't happen. I just really hope he doesn't pull anything like the incident yesterday, or I'm gonna have to really hurt him.
Hillary and Kasandra. Hillary has been my friend since last year. I had a thing for her briefly, but I realized it could never work. She's Suuuuuuuper hyper, and almost always happy. You also get a slap if you do or say something even mildly out of line (my arm still hurts) Kasandra is another one of the popular kids. I've been helping her out in various academic subjects.
Daryna and Yeudi. Daryna and Yeudi are my friends in gifted. They're both VERY eccentric. For example, if you mention the word "Sasuke" in front of Yeudi, she screams it and starts jumping around. She also has hugs like a vice. Daryna is kinda hard to describe, but I'm guessing my reader(s) know more about her than I do.
Mahtab. Mahtab has to be the nicest person I've ever met. She's always kind, curteous, and is very shy. If you even mention anything sex related, she screams. I mean like ear popping, glass shattering screams. I can't help but feel a bit protective of her at school, because she's just so timid. I know Dana feels the same way.
Dana. Time to embarass myself. Dana is amazing, simple as that. Smart, nice, beautiful. She's even got that darkside that most people don't have. People like to think that we're going out, but we're not. I really like this girl. to quote Weezer, from El Scorcho, "I think I"d be good for you, and you'd be good for me". I hate to say this, but if it had been Dana Bailey hit insted of Mahtab, I think I would've lost it and really hurt him.
So, these are my friends. Some I like, some not so much.
Thanks for reading!
Ali. Ali is my best friend. He's kinda weird, but thats kinda what I like about him. He's also really dirty minded (in a think up the most sexual scene contest, he could beat most pornstars)He usually plays football, but sometimes (and I mean rarely, walks around with us.
Mayuran, Michael, Boudy, Mathew, Jace, Zack and Chris. These guys are all buddies that I've known for a while. We aren't like best friends, and aren't even that close as friends. But we'll still get together and have a good time. Mathew is huge (6ft and we're not even in high school yet, Mayuran is lanky and likes to run. Boudy is a lot like Mayuran, but he's a tech genius too. Jace and Zack are both some of the "popular people". Chris is just plain freaking annoying. He's always trying to tell you about some throw he made the day before, or some other sportsa related thing that he's done and thinks for some unknown reason you would like to hear about (we're not really friends)
Bradley, Ganan, Edvin, Dima and Linar. Brad, Ganan, Edvin and Dima all hang out with Bailey. We all used to be friends (except for Bailey) but since he came it all kinda came unglued. Edvin and I were already not very friendly, as he seems to think life is a free ride, one of my major pet peeves. Ganan, Brad, Dima and I were really close, but when Bailey came they started to hang out with him, and by this year, once we we're in different classes, we're barely even friends anymore, much to my dismay. Linar is Dima's friend. I don't really like him.
Bailey, if you didn't get this from my last post, isn't exactly my best friend. He used to run into me in the hall whenever he walked by. He's always been a major prick. Keep in mind that he's ap to my chest in height, and not exactly burly. I'm 5'5, o that makes him about 4'5. He LOVES to be condescending, and is impossible to play sports with due to the fact that if you score a point, or do anything succesfully, he'll make some outrageous call that obviously didn't happen. I just really hope he doesn't pull anything like the incident yesterday, or I'm gonna have to really hurt him.
Hillary and Kasandra. Hillary has been my friend since last year. I had a thing for her briefly, but I realized it could never work. She's Suuuuuuuper hyper, and almost always happy. You also get a slap if you do or say something even mildly out of line (my arm still hurts) Kasandra is another one of the popular kids. I've been helping her out in various academic subjects.
Daryna and Yeudi. Daryna and Yeudi are my friends in gifted. They're both VERY eccentric. For example, if you mention the word "Sasuke" in front of Yeudi, she screams it and starts jumping around. She also has hugs like a vice. Daryna is kinda hard to describe, but I'm guessing my reader(s) know more about her than I do.
Mahtab. Mahtab has to be the nicest person I've ever met. She's always kind, curteous, and is very shy. If you even mention anything sex related, she screams. I mean like ear popping, glass shattering screams. I can't help but feel a bit protective of her at school, because she's just so timid. I know Dana feels the same way.
Dana. Time to embarass myself. Dana is amazing, simple as that. Smart, nice, beautiful. She's even got that darkside that most people don't have. People like to think that we're going out, but we're not. I really like this girl. to quote Weezer, from El Scorcho, "I think I"d be good for you, and you'd be good for me". I hate to say this, but if it had been Dana Bailey hit insted of Mahtab, I think I would've lost it and really hurt him.
So, these are my friends. Some I like, some not so much.
Thanks for reading!
Monday, January 26, 2009
Slight recap
Ok, so this is my first post. I guess I should probably start off with something grand, but I can't hink of anything. Sooooooooooooooo here goes.
Since Christmas (yup, I'm Christian)I've spent a lot more time alone. Don't ask me why, but i'm more angsty. It might help that i got a stereo for Christmas, and after hooking it up, I can now blast music while I'm doin something in there. I never used to spend much time there, because it's was always so cluttered, but now you can usually find me reading in my room while listening to music, or on my computer in the basement.
Flash forward to school getting back in after the break. My teacher is like 4 months pregnant, and so won't be there starting either March or April (I can never remember which)We have the usual projects, tests, Etc. and I'm doin fine, keepin my nice average.
Flash forward again to right now and last week. I'm usually inside at morning recess (I'm on this extra curicularr thing that demands it)I monitor a class of grade 5s with some friends at lunch, who can get pretty freakin' unbearable, but I deal. This week I get to miss school from Wednsday to Friday. It's because on Wednsday I have to go to a together we're better conference, Thursday I have Science Olympics, and Friday is a PA day. YAY.
At lunch (after they kick us outside) I have a routine. As soon as i get outside, I go to the portable that my friends monitor in. I walk with them inside and then back out, despite a rather bitter co-monitor. I then have two choices. I can either walk around with my friends or play football. I really enjoy both, but lately I've been kinda 'ball heavy, but I'm working on it.
Bailey. Oh dear god my sole desire in this world is to put this kid to an incredibly painful, slow death. But i won't. Today, when I was walking around with friends, we walked by this little peice of $#*! while he was playing doccer with some of his friends. The ball rolls up to Mahtab, one of my friends, and she kicks it lightly back. Next thing I know, this Bailey prick has just hit her right bove the waist. Now it's one thing to hit someone for no reason, but when it's a girl, well you might as well have come up and spat in my face.
So after he walks away, I begin to walk around in the viscinity. of course, they try to keep the ball away, but within about 15 seconds, there was a stray kick. So it's me and Bailey running after it. I get there a split second before he does, and boot the ball. I grab him and whip him down by his jacket, but the little sh*t grabbed me, so I went down too. We ended up with him on top, but it on'y stayed like that for a second before I ripped him off by the scruff of his neck. He says Mahtabs not a girl, and I call him a hemaphrodite.
We regroup, and as I'm asked if I'm OK, this f*cktard has the balls to walk up and wind up for a kick right at us, from less than 2m away. Before we can do anything, he kicks the ball, and it hits me in the shoulder, going right over us. Now if it had been an inch over, and he better be thanking god it wasn't, it would've hit Dana, my other friend. If that had happened, I would have calmy walked over, grabbed him, and turned his face into something in between a fine paste and a mush. Instead, I just walked away, after warning him that he was digging himself a hole, and he better be able to climb back out.
Mahtab goes to the counselor, who then calls Bailey and I down. After much deliberation (in other words him explaining his lies and me chuckling and snorting just loud enough for the counselour to hear, and me explaining my truths with him not being able to say anything as it would be a lie)The conclusion was that we should learn to "Not let our tempers get the best of us", and that was it. Just once I wish little pricks like him could get what they have coming. Ah, well, at least I got to jump him.
That's it for today, night readers (aka Dana at this point)
Make sure to tune in tommorw for our special feature on friends!
Since Christmas (yup, I'm Christian)I've spent a lot more time alone. Don't ask me why, but i'm more angsty. It might help that i got a stereo for Christmas, and after hooking it up, I can now blast music while I'm doin something in there. I never used to spend much time there, because it's was always so cluttered, but now you can usually find me reading in my room while listening to music, or on my computer in the basement.
Flash forward to school getting back in after the break. My teacher is like 4 months pregnant, and so won't be there starting either March or April (I can never remember which)We have the usual projects, tests, Etc. and I'm doin fine, keepin my nice average.
Flash forward again to right now and last week. I'm usually inside at morning recess (I'm on this extra curicularr thing that demands it)I monitor a class of grade 5s with some friends at lunch, who can get pretty freakin' unbearable, but I deal. This week I get to miss school from Wednsday to Friday. It's because on Wednsday I have to go to a together we're better conference, Thursday I have Science Olympics, and Friday is a PA day. YAY.
At lunch (after they kick us outside) I have a routine. As soon as i get outside, I go to the portable that my friends monitor in. I walk with them inside and then back out, despite a rather bitter co-monitor. I then have two choices. I can either walk around with my friends or play football. I really enjoy both, but lately I've been kinda 'ball heavy, but I'm working on it.
Bailey. Oh dear god my sole desire in this world is to put this kid to an incredibly painful, slow death. But i won't. Today, when I was walking around with friends, we walked by this little peice of $#*! while he was playing doccer with some of his friends. The ball rolls up to Mahtab, one of my friends, and she kicks it lightly back. Next thing I know, this Bailey prick has just hit her right bove the waist. Now it's one thing to hit someone for no reason, but when it's a girl, well you might as well have come up and spat in my face.
So after he walks away, I begin to walk around in the viscinity. of course, they try to keep the ball away, but within about 15 seconds, there was a stray kick. So it's me and Bailey running after it. I get there a split second before he does, and boot the ball. I grab him and whip him down by his jacket, but the little sh*t grabbed me, so I went down too. We ended up with him on top, but it on'y stayed like that for a second before I ripped him off by the scruff of his neck. He says Mahtabs not a girl, and I call him a hemaphrodite.
We regroup, and as I'm asked if I'm OK, this f*cktard has the balls to walk up and wind up for a kick right at us, from less than 2m away. Before we can do anything, he kicks the ball, and it hits me in the shoulder, going right over us. Now if it had been an inch over, and he better be thanking god it wasn't, it would've hit Dana, my other friend. If that had happened, I would have calmy walked over, grabbed him, and turned his face into something in between a fine paste and a mush. Instead, I just walked away, after warning him that he was digging himself a hole, and he better be able to climb back out.
Mahtab goes to the counselor, who then calls Bailey and I down. After much deliberation (in other words him explaining his lies and me chuckling and snorting just loud enough for the counselour to hear, and me explaining my truths with him not being able to say anything as it would be a lie)The conclusion was that we should learn to "Not let our tempers get the best of us", and that was it. Just once I wish little pricks like him could get what they have coming. Ah, well, at least I got to jump him.
That's it for today, night readers (aka Dana at this point)
Make sure to tune in tommorw for our special feature on friends!
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